Monday, December 29, 2008

Cleaning Queen

Day 1 of the Love Dare was yesterday. I think I did pretty well, except for a bump towards the end. I was working hard not to say anything negative at all, not to bicker, and definitely not to fight. There was a slip up, but I feel that I handled it fairly well; mostly it was miscommunication, and also the mistakes I've made in the past made the situation hard to resolve. But I had a good day, relationship wise; went to a wonderful church service, watched Star Trek movies, went to see Marley and Me in the theater (what a cute tear-jerker!). Altogether, definitely a day of rest.

Diet wise? I'm a wreck. The holidays were not handled as they should have been. And yesterday I *gasp* had cookies for breakfast, McDonalds for lunch, and Burger King for dinner. With popcorn, fudge, and cookies in between. The damage of the past week and a half? 5.5 lbs. That's right... I was 214. I am now 219.5. But I'm thinking positively. This morning, cookies for breakfast. That was a slip-up. A few minutes ago, 2 squares of chocolate. But I prayed, and knew that I would have to admit this here; so I washed some sweet potatoes, and I'm thawing some fish. I am climbing back on the diet wagon, even if I'm climbing a little unsteadily.

Day 2 of the challenge; do something nice for your spouse. I've been thinking about this. Today is the day that he works both jobs, then goes to the bar/bowling alley with his friends after work for "$3.50 burrito night". I don't see him much. I can't make a nice meal, because he's gonna eat lunch before he gets home. I can't make him dinner; I am marooned without a car, so I can't go buy a sweet gift. I COULD write a sweet note or something, but I don't think he's ready; it might make him frustrated and upset. So I just decided that I'm going to be Suzy Homemaker. I have never been great about keeping up on dishes, laundry, cleaning. Neither is he. I go through spurts where things are great, and I'm a neat freak, but then it just falls back into a dump. It's even harder because we're saving for China and live in a 350 sq ft studio apartment. Our stuff doesn't fit. How do you keep somewhere that small neat? Our food and dishes don't fit in the cabinets. Our clothes don't fit in the closet. We eat dinner at the foot of the bed, on our oak chest, because there isn't room for chairs or a table. But I'm doing my best. I've done 3 loads of laundry, dishes, and lots of scrubbing. I don't want him to worry about whether his clothes are clean, or what that wierd smell is. I want him to be able to come home to a clean, comfortable home, where he can feel calm. With my new positive attitude, and willingness to get things done, hopefully that will start coming true!

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